Broadjam Artist: Steve Dafoe – Songwriter
Song: Holiday Time
Reviewer: Kate Carpenter
Positive Comments: Here’s a sweet, engaging, “real home-made” Christmas song, straight from the heart. The guitar intro and playing throughout is so lovely…it’s just makes you feel like you’re sitting with the performer in front of the fireplace by the Christmas tree with his brothers Matt and John soaking up all the family love. Lots of specific word pictures draw the listener into the song and make it ever so real. The vocal is right on the snowflake (money didn’t seem like the right word to use here, ha ha). What a down home great voice to listen to. The Jingle Bells picking at the end was the icing on the Christmas cookie…well done!
Constructive Comments: As much as I liked this song, here are my suggestions for improvement. Correct me if I’m wrong, but on verse 2 did you divert from your rhyme scheme? I was looking for something rhyming with mistletoe. Love at all times…is the way to go? Maybe that’s not the best choice, but just something I noticed. I also didn’t understand the part about “see friends create so dear”. The best-crafted verse, in my opinion, was verse 3. guy and pie. Great rhymes and an original divergence from the standard cookies everyone else leaves. Pie is better by a long shot! One other lyrical problem is the two times I heard the word “the” emphasized. “Waiting for the THE one great day”. It’s just musically awkward to put the accent and emphasis on the word THE like you’re doing. A change in the phrasing or melody might solve that problem. I would also recommend shortening the chorus at the end. There are too many “home for the holidays.” By that time, we have gotten the point. Say it and wrap it up with that great picking of Jingle Bells. At any rate, I loved the song. Just trying to be constructive!