Broadjam Artist: Jeff Ashbaker
Song: When The Shadow’s Just Right
Reviewer: Kate Carpenter
Positive Comments: Interesting bass riff for the intro. Pleasing violin and guitar instrumentation kicks this song off. It’s a sad story of a guy who is saying goodbye to a friend/lover who has made choices that draw her away from him into a new chapter. Unique use of light/dark/shadows imagery. The first verse is your strongest storytelling point. Really like those lyrics “start in the middle or skip to the end.” Very original thought.
Constructive Comments: I’m looking for a definitive story. I’d like a clearer picture of who is this character you are singing about. Lover or friend? It’s obviously someone you knew “back when” who has moved on. The light to dark word picture is pretty clear. This person is heading in a “dark” direction, away from you, finding her place in her new world. So if it’s moving in the dark direction, how can that be in the place where “angels learn to fly”? That seems like a more light-infused image and a positive place. There is a lot of repetition in this song. It’s a nice song, but I think it needs work. Ending also needs to be more conclusive.