Broadjam Artist: StarburstRecords
Song: Dear World
Reviewer: Empty Atlas
Positive Comments: Man, really enjoyed the vocal performance on this one. I think the melody fits well with the rest of the instrumentation. It’s also tracked well enough that I really could hear. There’s also some really unique delivery in different moments that made me pay even closer attention. I think that delivery also helped to break up the song and always bring something new to the table.
Constructive Comments: I think the lyrics could use another pass, truthfully. I sure don’t hate what’s there, but you could benefit from writing them out and seeing if there are some words/phrases you could cut or reword to feel a little more cohesive. For instance, there are instances of “really really” and “always always” that just feel like you were filling space as opposed to using the rhythm real estate given to you. I also was really struggling to find the through-line on this song to tell you what exactly it’s about or how each verse connected to the chorus. A second listen may reveal a bit more, but obviously a lot of listeners aren’t going to give you two times to make a point.